Don’t Judge Your Kids – Parenting Wisdom3 min read

Kids’ brains are like sponges, absorbing everything around them. This is why dealing with their failures and achievements needs to be done diligently. They look up to their parents for support and appreciation in whatever they do which also impacts their level of confidence. 

As we stress ourselves out to become the best version of a parent possible, this impacts our children too. We set the highest possible standards for them because we want nothing but the best for them, but when they aren’t able to measure up to said standards, we end up judging them instead. 

However, parenting doesn’t come with a manual, and we all learn as we go. In the pursuit of being a perfect mother, here are some things we can keep in mind. 

Level of confidence

The impact of a high level of confidence is underrated in the life of your child. Not just in terms of achievements, but it also impacts how they perceive themselves. Diverting attention from their pitfalls and focussing on their wins instead helps them be self-assured. 

Keep cool, be positive and patient

Praise them for their achievements, no matter how small it seems. Try to change their outlook toward failure as not just a loss, but a stepping stone to success. Push them to just try their best, not to always focus on the win. 

Not scoring well in tests

Test scores, at the end of the day, are just a number. By teaching them to get up every time they are knocked down, you are preparing them, not just for exams, but for life instead. Try to be as supportive as possible. It’s perfectly natural for your kids to not be academically brilliant in every subject. If they ever score low in any exam or test, give them a hug, have a conversation with them about where they went wrong and try to be encouraging. 

Don’t shout during failures 

Every parent is scared for their child and only wants the best for them. However, if your first reaction is to yell at your child, this will negatively impact your child’s perception of failure in life. It also dampens their confidence and instils fear in them to try again. 

Comparing their behaviour to the ‘better’ sibling 

This is a common tactic used by parents to show their kids the ideal behaviour- by comparing them to either their friends or their siblings. However, this only results in the child feeling judged and inadequate. This doesn’t mean you should overlook their pranks and bad behaviour whenever it needs correction. Do guide them with kind words and be tactful about it. 

At the end of the day, keep in mind to go easy on yourself and on your kid as well. Little gestures for your child go a long way in their growth and development. As children, they look up to you whenever they need comfort or support. 

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